Alabaster

Revival.........Nah...Nothing fancy like that.

2009-05-14T01:06:00.000-07:00

3 Months out of army,

4 Weeks since ditching my stupid hair.

Now's the time to restart everything.

A Turn

2007-04-03T23:55:00.000-07:00

To anyone who chances upon this blog, you would notice this nifty esnips media player over --->

That song is not recommended when you intend to settle down for the night,
the high pitch vocals(well higher than me anyway) would not soothe any headaches as well, so pay heed and DO NOT act rashly.

I actually have no idea what date it is today.
(Posting to check the date when i double back on my blog later =S)

Preparations for enlistment have been made so I'm more or less ready for the life that lies ahead.

Mentally, not physically.

There will probably not be another post before I enter THE ARMY.

The past few months, were neither amazing nor relaxing.

From November to March I'd been on my toes with regards for my 'A's, and March was pretty much preoccupied with applying for the Universities and Army preparations and the undue worrying that came with it.

What exactly do you want to do with your future?

Countless times this question has been posed.

Perhaps to you, reader, the path is already laid out.

I want to....

Not for me.

Clinging unto existence.

Surviving on dreams.

I wonder if I'll ever wake up.

NS Enlistment

2007-03-30T10:57:00.000-07:00

Disclaimer-This post is not meant in anyway to insult NS or it's sub-groups. You may refrain from reading the post should you feel strongly inclined towards National Service.

NS-National Service. (Legend)

Servicing the officers (now doesn't that just sound ever so wrong)
in the name of nationalism?

Through the ages, countless comments like

'NS changed my boy!'
'My cooking is what he yearns for now!'
'He's a fully fledged independent being now!'
'He's lost his baby fat!'

have been seen and heard.

And indeed. Participants of the 2 year 'contract' have indeed changed with first hand experiences of being imbued with the 'knowledge' that there is nothing greater on Earth than NS, and that spit that escape from the OC's mouth while screaming at you is considered 'heavenly refreshment'

Sergeant's spit gives you wings!

The above sentence was not intended in anyway to sell a product for financial profit or to earn any remuneration for promoting an item, please do not sue me.

Acquaintances and friends alike have proven that in NS they are able to warp your mindset such that pain is indeed good for you and that you DO reap what you sow, in NS at least.

Normal words are broken down into individual letters which are in turn initials of words that make up a sentence that is meant to boost morale.

Apparently they prefer to dish out morale over cash for work in that 2 years.

One can't argue that it is indeed a cheaper alternative.

In this case, cheap is meant as a pun.

Now that the notorious junk lunches and meals have been replaced with nice meals, or so they say, (everything in NS is classified information, and any information leaked out is most likely untrue =S) it would seem that NS has evolved into a nice place to live.

Just think, the toilet ICs, blanket parties and the occasional supernatural being that reveals itself.

Doesnt THAT just sound like paradise on earth.

At the edge of the river styx.

As you can infer from my ranting so far, NS is not something I'm looking forward to.

Being stuck with men for 2 weeks is just unhealthy.
(However you interpret that comment is your responsibility alone, the writer is not insinuating anything =S)

We all know life becomes quite unbearable without the creature comforts.

And then there's the issue of the biological clock.

The schedule of NS appears to horridly clash with mine.

They should just start training at 8pm and sleep at 12pm.

But hey! It could be the start of a brand new adventure, after all it is the next step of life for this batch of pre-enlistees.

A new life awaits us!!!!

See, I'm turning already.

I found it! My enlistment letter! *Jumps for joy*

Lovely, April 9th 2007.

Just lovely.

The fine line

2007-01-04T08:00:00.000-08:00

It was the first working day of the year. 6.18am. I was running.

Across the road, glimpsing the students that were waiting for the sbs buses. In school uniform.

I suddenly felt distant, the school days long forgotten. I had joined the working class temporarily. The bus at 6.20am was packed as usual. Everyday I play a game of blackjack with the bus. Over 21 points and your bust. 6.21am, the time the bus leaves the stop. JJC seemed so untouchable in the distance, as year ones stumbled into the compound, unsure of the 3 months they would spend there.

Darkness, inside and out, every morning, eating away at my life.

The bus is like a sickbed, an illness hotspot. Coughing passengers, invisible in the dark, propelled germs that ploughed their way through the harsh air conditioning to the next nesting ground.

Thank god for dettol.

Yes, its cold every morning, but snuggling up to the male bangla next to you hardly seems a logical or morally correct choice. It would not do. 30 minutes of semi-sleep mode, coupled with the scent(or stench) of the worker next to you that had run out of toothpaste.

Passive poisoning, I call it.

Binds irreversibly to the haemoglobin in your red blood cells.

The bus stops. You get shoved by the crowd in the bus out of it. The scene everyday. Like drones, you join a queue, and punch-in your card, binding you to the worksite until the day is done. the time is 6.50. You are 40 minutes early. They don't pay you for being early, just dock your pay if you're late. No wonder the boss is so fricking rich. Stingy B*stard. Between 7.30 and 16.30, you get a mass of workers swarming in, much like the colours of a rainbow, the sunburnt, the shivering with cold, and the ones with bruises. You begin to miss people. You begin to despair, you begin to want to stop working. And then your paycheck arrives. They short-changed you.

Ps.refer to comment on boss.

Well you're handling the issue of your paycheck well, a second gust of news knocks you off your feet. Other establishments pay more for less work to be done. Then you rue joining this company. And you suddenly want to be an art model at.......

The eve of the eve of christmas eve

2006-12-22T03:52:00.000-08:00

The eve of the eve of christmas eve. It was a day spent wholly at work, a day I would not like to repeat. Work.

Work-1. Wrestling banglas for a spot on the bus.
2. Punching in the card the correct way.
3. Spend 7.30am-6.30pm doing endless work.(non-stop)
4. Hopefully getting a visit or msg frm a friend.
5. Falling asleep on the bus home.

I can't say I have really adapted to work. It's really more of a zhou yi bu kan yi bu routine for me (direct chinese translation of walk 1 step at a time and see how the future unfolds)

HR, being HR, is something like a publication unit, equipped with desirable environments and details that would mislead any potential job seeker into thinking that his/her allocation would be just as good as it is in HR.

By mislead, I mean that the rest of the place sucks.

The fhking banglas all like to eat snake. 1 day can receive at least 20 mcs. which i have to do data entry.

The diagnosis are often in the bangla's own handwriting.

And given their awesome understanding of english, fever can become feaver, feaves or fevar.

It is horrible.

It is 1 thing, howerver, to be able to interpret bangla's english and another altogether to read the doctor's handwriting.

Dealing with new terms such as the various terms of drugs, all 20 letters long and trying to interpret its full name from a line of (this is exactly what he wrote) ~~~~~~~~~.

Yes. He wrote gibberish.

How to read gibberish 101.

Then I found out I havent been punching in and out correctly, and had to write a timekeeping sheet to ensure my OT was recognised, involving more work. Sucks man.

When it is early morning, the situation is really like diarrhoea. You get a whole pile of diseased **** flowing into your environment.

Then today, the worst happened.

I fell asleep on the bus home. Found myself being the only 1,besides the bus driver, on the bus.
'No more stops.' I was frantic. Luckily i didn't sleep further than park oasis and i begged the bus driver to let me disembark at a bus stop.

Horrible. 30 minutes of walking to get home.

Just great.

I hate my job, I hate the possibility of working OT tmr.

Anytime BUT tmr. NO WAY I'm gonna do OT tmr.

The First Day

2006-12-18T04:30:00.000-08:00

They say you meet all kinds of people when you go out into the real world. I thought they were joking. They weren't.

Today.....sucked.

Getting up at 5.30am sucked.

It was the first day of work.

And I almost missed the bus.

I was asked a chinese national if he was waiting for the comapny bus at the taxi stand.

He said 'no, this is where the taxis stops, the buses are over there, by the bustop'

As i turned to the bustop, I saw him shuffling towards a bus that had stopped at the taxi stand. It was the comapny bus.
ZZZZZZZZZzzzzzZZZzzZz.

Reaching the compound 40 mins b4 the workday was scheduled to begin wasn't too bad, except I had no where to go.

I spent 40 minutes in HR slacking, as ppl came and gone, until Grace came in.

She ushered me into a room which I found my contract, the soul binding deathtrap, as i found out soon into the workday.

Signed.

It was as YY had said.

With angel wings, they usher you to hell, under the guise of loving and care, but bluntly put, a stab in the back.

ouch.

Medical center was nothing like an office.

It was, in a nutshell, a desk, a doctor, a dispenser and me.

There was only 1 computer, 1 chair, and 2 proficient tamil/malay/chinese speakers.

I wonder if they taught that in med school.

It was 8am.

The centre was crowded as hell.

Grace was afraid of going back to HR alone and so Melissa tagged along.

Good bye HR. Hello hell.

It was worse than YY's office.

That I was sure.

Because, well, instead of banglas, I get sick banglas, sick chinese, sick, malay and sick foreigners.

All well within germ-spreading distance.

GREAT.

The first job was relatively easy.

Type a number and print.

Easy as pie.

Then came dispensing medicine.

The fun part.

People's lives were in my hand, 1 wrong type of mediciation and it wud all be game over for them. I was playing god, i was playing devil, I was helping to stop overpopulation.
Then came, the weird cases.

If your imagination is really good, imagine being me, seated 2 meters away from a doctor asking a female worker, old enough to be his mother, to urinate into a small bottle.
Coaxing her, pleading with her.

You get the picture.

5 minutes later she returns, having triumphed over her infertile bladder and producing enough urine to be actually significant. And the doctor grabs the bottle, touches a file, and passes the file to me, all in 1 motion.

Lovely germs, really.

I expect to get sick in abt 3 days. or less.

apparently I was assigned there urgently because the previous contract worker there quitted suddenly.(GEEZ, I WONDER WHY.)

I heard a rumour about her quitting because she didn't want to contract chicken pox.

'Nonsense!' the doctor says. But heres a man that spent most of 2 hours applying cream on a worker's highly 'clean' feet.

When you work long enough you become immune. I'm afraid I might not have sufficient time to adapt.

Which brings me to case number 2.

Fancy this. A worker, around 10 years my senior, catching chicken pox.

There.

And then there was the blood in stool, classified as per-rectal bleeding.

Shipyard work is tough.

By lunchtime I was still quite hyped up.

Then. They locked the clinic doors.

No traffic in, or out.

Lovely.

As the rest retreated into a room wif poster-girls-wearing-almost-nothing wallpaper for some R & R during lunch, I stay outside behind my desk, pondering what to do.

Jokes were the only way out.

Thank goodness for yahoo.

And they taught me a very interesting and practical hierarchy.

Obviously, since MY (mainyard) workers had to leave the premises early, they were given priority, followed by normal. But then a boss called.

THE CHAIRMAN.

Not enough medication for chairman. 'Nvm, lets take the medication from the MY workers'

And thus 1 mainyard worker left wif inaqequate medicine, he might die, for all i know.

Then came the torture, the real reason why I don't like working there.

Number 1: No place to relieve boredom.
Number 2: No place to relieve workload.
Number 3: Too much workload and too much boredom.

In the afternoon I had to do data entry.

Never mind that I didn't know what and how to spell the illnesses.( there was a small dictionary on the desk detailing everything from cellulitis to masturbation.(The definitions)

All i had to do was enter the correct terms.

But I wasn't born to be a code breaker.

The doctor, like all doctors, employ a type of handwriting highly similar to jason chua's handwriting.
Illegible Handwriting bearing a striking resemblance to wingdings.

Of course, my brain is not armed with a decoder.

For every entry I had to ask them, making me feel worse, and worse.....

I was glad 4.30pm reached when it did.

And then they asked me.

' Wanna work overtime?'

Stuck.

2006-10-18T04:29:00.000-07:00

I can't really work out what's happening to me right now.

It's like what's happening at prelims.

Hopeless denial, and extreme unhappiness.

I feel so lost, and typed this just to give vent to my emotions.

Of course any web comments would not be very much appreciated.

READ- NOT.....APPRECIATED.

Any Comments will be seen as purely lip-service.

Damn lost!

Damn lost ar!!

Of course others will be going through this trying period as well.

Try to handle yourselves and I ll be doing the same.

I really need a quick fix.

A New Chapter

2006-09-10T23:52:00.000-07:00

A new chapter.

The burden of the future rests upon our shoulders, the weight of OUR future.

Dream now, dream fast.

Everyone knows, some abide, some deny.

From whence shalt judgement befell?

Know your aim, know your path, know YOUR FUTURE.

Soon it will be time for merry,
soon it will be time to feast,
soon it will be time for jumps of joy,
and let's hope there's no grief.

Blinded by desire I'm, scorched by the flames of greed.

Come rain, deliver me from my torment.

New Post

2006-07-26T09:25:00.000-07:00

S.t. no longer sounds appropriate.

It's time to change.

As with life.

Do I?

Yes?

I would love to embark on another superlative-filled essay about how I adore darkness and its derivatives, namely pessimism.

However, I do not have the luxury to exploit this space, given that boredom of readers would probably stop their reading by the third line.

I've stopped trying to please.

I'm evil, as I've always been.

Do not mistake my malice for jokes.

I warn, I'm evil.

Not to the extent of you having to call the cops though.

Questionable Character

2006-05-18T23:25:00.000-07:00

Just who am I?

Losing faith, losing hope, losing my goal.

Nowadays I spend more time on the computer than on anything.

Eyesight's getting from bad to worse, and parents keep updating me on the number of people

who died due to computers.

Isn't that news just uplifting.

But hey, it's just a phase.

Or isit?

Blogging

2006-03-10T04:36:00.000-08:00

It's scary what change can do.

A mere couple of months and here I'm, crippled of thoughts, bereft of wit and my writing ability severely restricted.

Anachronism(noun)- My brain is an anachronism.

Writing no longer seems to flow, and I can no longer muster the energy to see if others are still trekking on this vast marsh of blogs.

Oh woe is me.

Online attendence is, at best lukewarm, and each single draft is coarsely written.

It appears as though my life has began to turn mundane, and with it, the content continually presenting itself in my updates.

Perhaps, if only, there were more...

Total Defence Day

2006-02-15T06:04:00.000-08:00

Total Defence Day.

The holiday that isn't a holiday.

I was actually very inspired and wanted to write a whole ton of words detailing the origin of this 'fantastic' holiday.

But I was afraid I would fall asleep writing the nitty gritty details(Honestly! Who still uses such archaic English? But me?)

Over the holidays, during the days when the Internet was an infinite improbability, I dedicated my cells to good use.

I inspired, respired and expired.

Yup.

I expired.

Good bye old lazy self, hello new lethargic entity!

Of course, over the holidays, much more interesting things happened.

Much more interesting than Total Defence Day.

Like when I slipped on dog poo, at home.

Of course, in tactful consideration of the readers'appetite, I'll exclude the fascinating details.

Over the holidays, I also dreamt of games I would be able to play.

Sports was always on my mind.

Counter-Strike was endearing.

And well, boredom can drive you nuts sometimes.

This entry is 9 days late, primarily because I couldnt access blogger without my neighbour's connection.

And with this entry, you know what that means.

Internet Connection

2006-02-12T00:05:00.000-08:00

I've finally deciphered it. The reason why I couldn't access blogger before.

No, it's not because of my computer, not because of my norton antivirus, which I sacrficed.

Instead it's due to my internet connection.

And why can I update now?

Because I'm stealing the connection speed from my neighbour upstairs.

Pity him.

But alas, this is only a temporarily measure.

I must reconfigure my internet access to work out how to fully utilise my connection to the maximum.

Next post will be when I manage to slay the connection monster.

The longest wait

2005-12-28T05:10:00.001-08:00

The longest hour, the longest train ride, the longest movie.

All these thoughts were swallowed by 'the longest wait'.

2 months, embroiled in boredom and misery, was, in a nutshell, a living hell.

'If boredom could kill, we'd all be dead.'

As the days dragged on, minutes lengthened, hours crawled and days enlongated into eternity.

Constant smoke flooding my nasal passages, throughout this season of hell, was the least of my worries.

Who asked for parents who smoked.

Who asked for an alcoholic parent?

The rumours were always true; a drunkard and sober person were on two different spheres,

as with Dr Jackal and Mr Hyde.

Alcohol is probably the potion that turned the former into the latter.

As if boredom weren't lethal enough, sigh...

Screw liquors.

Screw waiting.

Screw my annoying dog. (Wait, that didn't come out right...)

But alas, a revival ought not be tainted by such vulgar words.

And with this, I end the beginning.

Birthdays

2005-11-12T23:15:00.000-08:00

I'm actually supposed to be watching 'Frequency' now.

But...'Put the lime in the Coke, you nut.' turned me off completely.

This entry will be short.

Today is my sister's birthday.

Tomorrow will be a classmate's birthday.

The day after tomorrow will be a previous classmate's birthday.

Luckily, I'm not close to any of them.

No gifts required.

Drowning in 'Luxurious'.

Chain Mail

2005-11-10T19:43:00.000-08:00

I found myself laughing as I deleted 'Written Report', 'Survey' and 'Annex' from

my inbox a few minutes ago.

I wonder if it was due to the happiness I felt;

Project Work was finally resting in a glass coffin,

to be exhumed in the year 2007.

Or was it because of the agony I experience,

once again staring into my tainted monitor.

Then my butt started to itch so I stopped laughing.

Then I found something worse than Project Work in my inbox.

Chain-Mail.

No, not armour.

It's Chain-Mail.

One of the titles read, 'Why boys like girls.'

I always thought that was because of genetic manipulation,

but then...

Of course.

As usual, I was wrong.

The 50 odd reasons given didn't give the slightest hint of...

We were made that way.

Enlightened.

Well, the following reason has to be a winner.

12. They look so warm even though it's minus 30 degrees outside.

I didn't understand that.

Anyways, Chain-Mails always come eqiupped with the following section.

Send to 5 people: You will have good luck.

Send to 10 people: You will have extremely good luck.

Send to 15 people: Good grades will follow you.

Send to 20 people: You will become a highflyer.

Send to 25 people: Who is Bill Gates? You are!

And of course...

If you don't send this email to anyone, or less than 5 people,

you will experience bad luck all your life.

This kinda explains why I'd been having bad luck ever since

I told people about my email address.

Just to add on,

You send 5 people, 10 people, 20 people I also not scared!

I'm back!~ Temporarily

2005-11-09T20:50:00.000-08:00

Yes! I'm back!

*Laughs out loud~*

For those of you ~~loyal~~ ~~free~~ bored enough to access this blog,

you caught me on a good day.

The winds are howling, the leaves are rustling,

and most importantly, my monitor isn't red!

Ah! Isn't the world such a nice place.

My mood is a balance only affected by an

equilibrium constant km (equilibrium constant of monitor).

I command you to laugh now.

You know it's funny.

Okay, so it's not.

I think I speak for everyone when I say

we drew sighs of relief when the OP finally ended.

After all, some people can finally be rid of

unproductive group members (points to myself).

Along the way of this Project Work, there were queer moments, lousy moments,

and gay moments.

Ahahaha.

Now it's time to be unkind and gloat over failed ideas.

Yes. I'm that evil.

Failure number 1: Use racoons to steal from neighbours.

Pity it didn't work out, I was positive there was a market for this.

Failure number 2: Use rafflesia to produce a conducive environment

for skunk courtship.

Multiple people agreed on that, but, whatever, it failed.

Ahahaha.

Failure number 3: Use cactus to help Singapore to stop sucking on

Malaysia's ~~milk~~ ~~life-force~~ water.

Ahahahaha.

Failed!

And the list runs on...

Note: The ideas I quoted were good!

(yes, even the racoons, in my opinion anyway.)

They juz didn't have enough chance for development,

since better projects were introduced.

Introducing the candidates!

Contestant Number 1: Wasabi Toothpaste!

Weighing in at roughly 150grams, this gooey green paste

aka. Wasabi Japonica, with its isothiocyanates and blardy enzymes

is a tough competitor in the race for 'Best Invention'!

Contestant Number 2: Blueberry Sugar!

Quoting from the inventor's group, will the Almighty Blueberry Sugar

be able to cast its superiority in stone?

With its overwhelming traces of anti-oxidants,

Blueberry Sugar will definitely be a favourite for old-timers!

Contestant Number 3: A Hairy Issue.

This reporter recently asked the leader of this group,

"Did you grow your hair specifically?"

Although hesitant, the leader eventually replied with a yes!

That is reason enough for people to vote for him!

Such compelling charisma!

*Reporter is currently puking after typing the previous statement.*

~Transmission~

~Please Standby~

And we are back on our feet once again!

Lining up the fourth row of the nominated inventions is.....

Contestant Number 4: Pitcher Plant ~~Cum~~ Juice!

Likewise to contestant number 1, this group is also bringing plants

and their entourage of bloody enzymes! The digestion of dead insects is bound to

rile several insects lovers! Gothic fans will go wild!

"Ooh! There goes its brain! Its limbs! I just love the gore!"

Quote by: Yours Truly.

And bringing up the rear of the nominees....

Contestant Number 5: Jet-Black Ammo, originally, but now contorted into

Black-Jet Ammo! (What a shame)

Fronted by a polygamist as well as a self-proclaimed 'sexy chick',

what's stopping this team?

Just a little something that I call

Me.

My doubts about this project still stand firm.

Well, maybe I'm just sore from being the only person in the entire level

to say 'lor' during the Oral Presentation.

I just realised Yiyang's group used CP's preliminary Idea and vice versa.

And there's a phrase for it.

Infringement of Copyright Laws.

May I add that chopping up dead ants is cruel and

that himself's toilet looks nice? yes?

I hope you enjoyed the read.

Msn is down, for reasons beyond me.

I've done it!

2005-10-28T22:30:00.000-07:00

Didn't blog yesterday, probably divine intervention to stop my blogging craze.

Internet went dead on me, I got angry. (You know that accent.)

Introduced violence to my computer.

Wham-Bam-Alakazam!

Monitor turned red.

Oh joy.

Well, in my pique of anger, I started deleting programs.

Now, everything is gone.

Left with bare essentials of Msn Messenger, Office 2000, internet access,

Realplayer, and of course, Solitaire.

Strangely, my internet is working now. (duh!)

And I feel sick. Third time this year, same disease, probably.

Moaning/screaming/groaning away at school today only served to annoyed people.

And of course, exaggerate my condition.

Not that a throbbing headache coupled with

rising body temperature is something to sneer at.

Being able to complain is possibly one of life's greatest pleasures.

Dad forced some weird concoction down my throat.

And now I feel like a million dollars!

If only I could say that...

My dog, benji, seems to be down with some sort of

deviated Parkinson's disease.

At regular time slots,
(Note: I say 'time slots' because it happens around the same time everyday.)

he starts trembling uncontrollably.

I wonder if he saw something.

But since I'm a ~~staunch~~ ~~highly devoted~~ ~~spiritually inclined~~

person who believes in god, I acknowledge that god will protect us believers.

And for that, I ensconce in my faith in god.

Will I be well?

Only time will tell.

Will others fall as well?

How the hell am I supposed to know? Goddammit!

The End

2005-10-26T18:53:00.000-07:00

The final entry, the last of five entries, spawns today.

Some may know, some may not.

Was going to/wanted to/had every intention to go to ACC today.

But then kai liang stole my phone, so I had to go get it back,

and ended up missing ACC. (Damn!)

So I went home early instead.

So here I'm now, suffering at home,

when I could have enjoyed slogging my guts out at ACC.

Oh...Woe is me.

Been rather chilly for the past couple of days, with showers drenching everything.

Just the way I like it.

You see, rain is the closest to snow in Singapore, given that it doesn't hail.

Ever since I was a kid, cartoons showing on christmas morning have always
featured snow, ghosts and Santa Claus.

Now, watching Santa Claus disillusioned me, making me arrive at the equation :

Snow = Santa Claus = Presents = Happiness.

Thereafter, my goal in life was to actually see and touch real snow.

Easy? You try living near the equator and get real snow.

And finally, a few years ago, I saw it, touched it even.

It was my last night in Beijing then,

and when I was at the train station,

It started snowing!

Excited, I opened my mouth and tried to catch a flake.

It didn't taste all that great.

I think I swallowed ash instead.

-___________-"

And now presenting....

My Trip To China

Saw lotsa dead grilled rabbits hung at the hawker's stall..

Looked like raptors, where ears were supposed be,

holes were in their place.

The End.

What?! You expected me to say more?

What do I say when I can't remember?

Oh yeah...the cucumbers there taste relatively good.

And this makes it four!

2005-10-25T20:55:00.000-07:00

Upon reaching the fifth consecutive day of blog entry, I'll probably hibernate.

I just find that it's so sad that famous/semi-famous people receive so much flak

for just commenting on politically incorrect issues.

I'm probably just regurgitating what you people think when I say,

Who are you to denounce people?

as well as,

No one is perfect.

It's just so weird.

These phrases have been used ad nauseam,

and yet people seem to forget the very meaning of these phrases.

Sure, sure, famous people need to be role models so that

your kids/relatives' kids/friends' kids don't grow up corrupted.

And although people may snort about famous people requiring a clean slate,

there may very well be people who actually like singers who set their hair on fire.

So, who are you to denounce them?

You're a taxpayer, you say.

You have the right to make sure your kids don't grow up to be corrupted individuals.

The truth is, you just insult/chide/denounce to make yourself feel better.

You preach about what is 'correct' so that others know you have a good heart and

nominate you to go to heaven after you die.

You forget no one is perfect.

You scream that because they have wide-reaching effects,

celebrities, journalists and the average blogger shouldn't talk about

or do anything significantly politically incorrect.

It's just stupid when one trivial matter erupts into a hailstorm of insults.

The truth is, people are like vultures, they can co-exist,

but when one particularly 'fat' individual falls,

the others swoop in for a free meal.

Raining spit and likewise sentiments of 'You shouldn't have done/said that',

in place of beaks, on the fallen one.

It's just sad. Human nature.

In this frenzy, the comment of 'No one is perfect' is forgotten and

is instead replaced by 'He finally fell! I've been waiting for this day for eons!'

Deriving satisfaction from the fact that, indeed,

no one is perfect.

Disgusting.

You don't raise in rank when someone falls,

you can only rise by investing effort.

It's a known fact that people rejoice when someone of better status,

relative to them, falls.

All due to jealousy.

Who can seriously say they've never been visited by the green-eyed monster?

And people say they hate hypocrites.

But of course, exceedingly improper displays,

such as promotion of guns, should be denounced.

The irony, of it, is that, me, being a nobody, wrote this all out.

Something just overwhelmed me.

Note of apology :

I'm sorry for wasting your time,

for in your minds,

you probably already had a clear idea of what I'd written.

Such predictability I displayed,

and for that I'm embarrassed.

Updating.....again?!

2005-10-24T19:45:00.000-07:00

Why am I updating daily?

That's a really profound question, which requires an equally profound answer.

Maybe it's because of the avian flu and the recent spate of natural disasters.

Or perhaps the joy I derive from pouring my soul into an online dairy,

never mind the fact that it means people have access to my warped mind.

People all over the world are dying, with floods, hurricanes and dead poultry

plaguing their land.

Is Armageddon coming?

Perhaps.

Will we go the way of the dinosaurs,

killed by the likes of feathery chicken.

I hope not.

It would be an embarrassment to be exterminated by the ~~hands~~ ~~paws~~

wings of a chicken.

I often ponder, what if ostriches were carnivorous?

And lions, herbivorous?

What if armadillos ate dung.

What if humans queerly thought faeces were the ultimate expression of love?

All I know is, if that were true, 'himself' would turn into a shitface.

Forget flowers, chocolates and jewelry.

Call 74424381 (which spells shit)

to order a fabulous pile of stool for your loved one right now!

While stocks last!

Ah, but I'm digressing.

Armageddon, the term we all fear.

For, regardless of race, language or religion,

there is, no life after death.

Every good ol' environmentalist knows how to bitch about

global warming, greenhouse gases and animal rights.

Many businessmen complain about

little profit, taxes and marriage rites.

With unity comes power.

Even kids know that.

Thanks to the disgusting over-commercialisation of

the Power Rangers, Captain Planet,

and yes, who could forget,

Bananas in pyjamas.

Are you thinking what I'm thinking B1?

Sorry, no. I can't read minds, I'm a banana.

Almost got propelled into a pile of 'dung' today.

Which I managed to avoid, thanks to my cat-like reflexes, I'd like to say.

But no I can't. I don't possess lightning reflexes,

and the only thing which held me back was probably my inertia.

Blubber saves the day once again.

Oops! digressing again.

Like I was saying, with unity comes power.

To stop this dreadful display of producing asphyxiating gases into the atmosphere,

NATO, UN, ASEAN and the rest of the world
(Don't I just sound noble? =D)

should work up agreements to keep use of fossil fuels to a bare minimum.

Unless, of course, the bare minimum is the amount we are using now.

Then we should all just stop using fires and electricity.

Cook food with body heat!

Obviously the rest of the world is going to turn down this proposal and

the fossil fuel/global warming crisis isn't going to be resolved until

we eventually run out of fuels to burn.....

But that won't be a problem, since by then the polar icecaps would have

already taken care of the human population by immersing

our sorry asses 7m underwater.

At least spare a thought for Captain Planet (CP).

A prayer, anyone?

A Fresh Perspective

2005-10-23T20:07:00.000-07:00

Sometimes surprises just spring from the queerest of places.

My mousepad, that came along with my computer,

as I've just discovered, proudly boasts the words :

Ready for the year 2000.

With an imprinted 1999/2000 calendar densely populating the rest of the surface.

And covering the flank of the whole array of words,

ACER

A Fresh Perspective.

You can imagine the irony of these words,

on a mousepad dating back to the previous millennium,

appearing in the present.

Now you know, ACER products can last for 5 years before

a crimson shade veils your monitor.

What were you doing in the year 1999?

Try to recall.

1999, the year when we were still friends.

1999, the year when I still had a teacher spewing foul words

out of his mouth every other day.

1999, the year when Clinton was still in office.

1999, the year when the first millennium baby was already dead for 900+ years.

1999, the year when I started taking higher Chinese.

1999, the year when I was first threatened by a bully.

1999, the year after I punched some poor dude.

1999, the year, when I bought this computer.

And, 1999, the year when I celebrated the 11th anniversary of my current hair-style.

Some things change, some don't.

Have your feelings been shaken yet?

Updating.

2005-10-22T19:00:00.000-07:00

Ah yes. I'm updating again, since I'm feeling particularly light-headed

after my daily dose of dog fart. And Oooo...doesn't my radiant monitor look lovely?!

'Takes a deep breath'

Ah yes, This IS the life.

Never mind that my pw project has met with a gigantic boulder of a problem,

or that I find myself sinking into a swamp of boredom,

there is always the lovely notion of homework to keep my troubles tucked away.

That is, until homework becomes a problem in itself.

Yeah baby! my dog has done it again! Utterly amazing!

I'm obliged to say,

Monster Kill!

And the sun is setting once again, and those pesky aedes mosquitoes won't be a

problem until the next 12 hours.

Isn't it great to be alive?

Provided you have a life supply's worth of tranquilizers to

keep you permanently sedated.

Oh wait! it's available!

Its technical term is Reconis Avalvatica Qier Xalidephibin.

But normal people know it as work.

So be glad that you are like the rest of the billions of others,

blessed with this luxury of work.

Myself

2005-10-20T21:57:00.000-07:00

Dear readers, this entry is going to be quite long.

Familiarity breeds contempt.

An apt description of me.

The more time people actually spend with me, the more they get annoyed with me.

I'm probably in a class slightly higher than terrorists.

Why? I'm still a homosapien. They are inhumane.

I apologise.

There are probably three types of people in this world.

1. Those who open up immediately to strangers, nothing hidden.

2. Those that don't open up, ever.

3. Those that open up after a while, like clams.

I find myself belonging to the third type.

There's always various levels of security around me, with new aspects of me uncovered at each level advancement.

-"People may not be who they seem to be."-

This sentence has been hanging in my mind since the beginning of the year since it was uttered by natalie.

I wonder if she meant me. Cos, I wasn't really 'me' during the beginning.

Like I was saying, I belong to the third type.

Opening up, you might have thought, would probably bring forth a butterfly with angelic personality.

If you were expecting that, I refer thee to thy Powerpuff Girls.

What was unleashed, however, was a swarm of locusts.

And so readers, let's be true to ourselves.

Ever since you've known me, how many times has it been since I:

- lent you a hand?

- lent you some cash?

- gave you something other than the middle finger or a foul name?

- thanked you for being my friend?

- showed you the appreciation you deserve?

I can answer that.

Never.

And for that I apologise.

Some of you know me as a jester, a slacker, a loser,

or rather, on one occassion, one of you might remember me as a pufferfish.

How true. Nobody knows you like yourself.

From the quiet facade I presented to you before you had the misfortune of knowing me,

an annoying person had developed.

The procrastinator, the critic, the utterly bo-chap person.

Me. Yours truly.

I guess I've sorta been 'institutionalised', some might recall this term,

so much that now every sentence I use to respond is coated with acrimonious sarcasm

and/or tinges of false jealousy.

I've always been the one to be overly prejudiced,

building on a mild dislike of some peers by people around me,

and degenerating it into a full-scale war.

My blatant abhorrence of some individuals, in retrospect, splatter my memory with disgust.

And for that I apologise. It is a habit that must be changed.

Not that subtle backstabbing is any less damaging.

Now I understand.

The saying,

"People were born to be loved, not hated." (Probably a figment of my imagination.)

dictates, "He who has not harmed should not be injured." (Likewise, I made that up.)

I've decided to drop all my hatred, borne out of nothing but peer pressure.

At this point, surely you can see, this is my confession box, and you are the priest.
So please don't give up on me, for you are my only hope.

It's Singaporean to complain about things, but it's you who actually bitches.

Bitching is not a prerogative, especially when you can't earn your own keep.

So envy not the things others have, and drown in your despair,

for every parent in the world wishes the best for those in their care.

Pentium 2, who cares, I love the computer the way it is.

(Please note, these feelings may subside the next day.)

It's weird, you know, after typing this out, it seems a burden has been lifted,

Is it my imagination? or is it something worse?

But for now, please know, I'm sorry. (la)

For the last part, I apologise again.

Another one of those days...

2005-10-19T22:30:00.000-07:00

My computer is so laggy that I even have trouble typing.

I really wish this computer would quit trying to f**k me up.

And my PS2's a goner too.

Seriously, the things I own are likewise to junk.

Screw this.

Even blogging poses a problem.

I forsee tomorrow there are people who are gonna go, "Wow! You actually ..."

Don't get what I mean? See me in class tomorrow.

And my blogger seems to have a virus...yucks.

Anyways...

Yes. He does. You have a problem with that?

Quote generator obtained from : here.

Anime

2005-10-17T19:31:00.000-07:00

Unless you are 'Incredibly' well-versed in the goings-on in the world,

and still think the Japanese contributed nothing but World War II to the world,

You would have heard of/chosen to hear of....

Anime!

Yes. Those characters that come alive from the pages of manga.

I'm obviously not learned about the arts of anime,

and I can not offer advice on how to draw those kawaii characters,

(Think Primary One Art = C)

but I do know one thing....

I like Anime.

The rest of this entry was deleted due to total ineffectiveness of props used.

9 million bicycles

2005-10-15T23:34:00.000-07:00

Presenting.....'There are 9 million bicycles in Beijing'

---

That song is nice, seriously.

---

You know what people say about dogs licking wounds = heal faster?

---

It's a myth, a fallacy.

---

Yes.

-----

I struggle to understand what's so effective about saliva contaminated with dogs' urine, ants, and the occasional cockroach.

Another one of.....

Nature's Great Mysteries!

Ahem.

And it has come to my attention that a new blog has been set up.

Nono...it's not www.miloandnaruto.blogspot.com.

For those dumb enough to have clicked that link, you know you wanna find out more about him.

I hope readers won't take offence at the previous sentence.(or rather, clicked the link.)

Do you enjoy the day or night better?

Are you a sunshine person? or rather a gothic vampire?

For me, staring out at trees at night sorta takes the stress away, the time where inner peace is achieved.

And that's a little more about me.

Melting Snow Flakes...

2005-10-11T19:56:00.000-07:00

Hm...conditional pass.

I'll probably apply for that.

Hopefully I won't fail mathematics.

Well for GP....

Overall B4.

Hm...

30 marks for content in essay = 4.15 pages. (7 marks = 1 page of writing.)

Until this period of uncertainly ends...

Just bite me

2005-10-10T19:42:00.000-07:00

Do me a favour and just bite me.

Argh...results fluctuating from bad to sorely-bad to terminal.

Seriously...I can't stand being retained.

I don't wanna.

Nobody wants to.

Probably bad karma.

I think I kicked too many cats.

At the point between life and death.

Should I stay, or should I go? ~~~

Mathematics...sighz.

Why?! Why that grade?

Problematic.

Yeah I wish I could write about something better, more animated and in a nutshell, cheery.

Sigh.

And there's GP....

Out of money, out of luck and out of juice.

It's all about 'Face'

2005-10-08T21:13:00.000-07:00

Walked my dog today and realised that I've been neglecting this duty for the past few weeks.

I blame it on pre-exam stress, exam stress, and post-exam stress.

I still have nightmares of my results.

Sigh.....

Anyways, like I was saying, I walked my dog today.

So we were walking along this void deck when we saw this labrador retriever, un-leashed.

The poor dog repeatedly picked up an empty soft drinks can which its owner was consisently throwing. (Think ball-launching machine.)

So we went over to say hi.

Then something annoying happened.

First impressions are very important.

Obviously his impression of me wasn't exactly nice.

That knnccb guy 'diao' me.

Brushing my greeting off with a look that said, " Get your tainted dog away from my premium breed, a**hole."

Yeah. Go screw yourself too.

I hope your dog chokes on that aluminium can.

A similar incident happened at Jurong point. I'm sure people remember.

But let me relate it again.

Me - Carrying Donation Can.

O-ba-san - Carrying a purse.

I walked next to her, stretching out my donation can, with an expressionless face.

No smiles until you donate.

She took out her purse, reached for some money, and 'diao'ed me.

Thanks man, I really can't live without my daily dose of 'diao'.

O-ba-san then proceeded to walk past me, and donated to another student, Jason.

Yeah, I'm evil and devious-looking.

Time for plastic surgery, I'll say.

It's over.

2005-10-05T19:58:00.000-07:00

The promotional exams are over.

My ps2 is getting all rickety again...

I still haven't got a new computer.

My nights are spent fearing for my results.

This is me, at this point in my life.

Another chapter...

Weekend

2005-09-16T20:27:00.000-07:00

At long last the weekend is finally here!

I can finally enjoy more than 4 hours of sleep!

Given our current situation, you would find that most of my classmates would be looking forward to this break, both for the uninterrupted chance to study, and to replenish their dose of the sandman's sand.

Promotional exams are coming, probably won't be updating; the setting just isn't right.

I don't exactly want to retain.

And oh, to those who frequent this blog, good luck for your exams, be it that you're in JC or poly.

Signing off.

Fun homework

2005-09-10T22:04:00.000-07:00

Did you know that doing homework can be fun and awfully enriching?

No, I'm not kidding.

I seriously think that homework might actually be fun, that is, if there weren't the ever-enticing games.

The new TCA4 seems.....Enjoyable.

It's a pity there's still a ton of work for me to do.

But still, promos are coming...ought it not be the time I start meditating?

Too much milo and too little Naruto Vcd makes john a dull boy.

Maelstrom of doom

2005-09-07T20:18:00.000-07:00

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.

I feel like I'm being sucked right out of this reality, and once again, annoyance is headbutting my other feelings out the way.

Everyday I come in contact with my computer, I get increasingly frustrated with it.

Giving the monitor a punch didn't help, I was the one who ended up with a red-eye syndrome.

Thanks a bunch monitor.

Life is spiralling into hell.

How enticing.

Only 4 days remain now.

Hopefully they drag on more than a mere 96 hours.

Hooked

2005-09-03T23:33:00.000-07:00

For some queer reason, I've been hooked on a text-type game recently, a game I last played 3 years ago.

At this rate, something bad is gonna happen.

This game delivers immense amount of stress, and coupled with a computer like mine, while the consequences are dire.

How am I gonna study for promos in this frenzied state?

Get free software here!

2005-09-02T20:11:00.000-07:00

Now seriously, are you that gullible?

Anyways, been meaning to update but somehow my commitments always seemed to get in the way. ;)

It's kinda weird, everyone seems so fine at school, and yet...

Guess everyone has an alter ego eh.

Well everyone except kailiang.

Mr Happy.

lol.

Ugh. My dog just scared off a kid walking past my corridor.

Poor dude.

Not really much to elaborate on, devoid of inspiration, bereft of events.

Except...everyone finally paid up for the class fund at long last! Amazing isn't it?

However, it has brought another matter into my consideration, obviously the class fund is not capable of funding anymore notes purchases, not until I collect another round at least.

So, pay heed, the next collection will be due 12th September 2005. Chairman, I'm counting on you to notify those oblivious of the existence of this pathetic blog. The sum due is $10 per person. And oh, you won't get dividends.

Signing off,

The big, the bad and the bald.

Apologies...

2005-08-28T01:35:00.000-07:00

I'm sorry.

To those I'd known I've pissed off, and those I don't.

I've been a jerk, and will probably continue being one.

This entry is not a prank, nor is it insincere, but there is nothing I can say but,

"Please forgive me."

I can see a flying whale...

2005-08-26T21:12:00.000-07:00

It seems like almost everyone is still reeling from the excitement that came along with the common tests.

Almost every blog I've been to is about(No marks for guessing), the common tests.

Yes. Even mine.

It's high time this behaviour stopped. =O

The past binds.

I had pizza for the Alumni Connection Club meeting today! Waiting in school after lessons was worth it after all...lol.

How do you feel at this point in time?

2005-08-24T21:17:00.000-07:00

It's time. Yes, right at this point in time, with my sister screaming a whole array of colourful expletives into my ears, asking me to stop typing on the blasted 5-year old keyboard.

And catch a god-damned episode of Superstar.

Ah well, it seems I've yet to be consumed by the phenomenon known as 'oof'.

But now I'm on the run for stealing scooby dooby's "doo".

Weirdly, I don't really feel anything.

Okie, maybe it's not that weird.

After all, this trend has been going on for, say, the past 4 years?

If the current observed trend differed from the expected trend, it would only

mean anomalous results, and would signal the appearance of

'artefacts'.(remember microscopy anyone?)

And even though I seriously doubt anyone is concerned, you won't be seeing any gloomy looks on this blogger's face anytime soon.

That is, unless someone steals a packet of 'mamee', upon which I shall unleash a wrath beyond description:

$50 for class fund! NOW!

I'm an oof.

2005-08-20T00:42:00.000-07:00

Yes. It's official. I can smell 'retaincy' right from August.

I have obtained yet another sorely 'outstanding' grade for my common test.

Not any old Avant garde 'O' , but rather, yes, you know it.

The simple and simply annoying 'O'.

I detect another 'fabulous' grade for my biology.

Ugh.

I blame my computer. Yes. Curse you computer.

Do you know that a red monitor kills 76% of your brain cells?

Of course not.

I just made that up.

I suppose it kills more.

Now here's a thought:

Rate of success = Effort invested X (6/10) + Speed of computer X (4/10)
= 34% X (6/10) + 676 mhtz or isit hertz? X (4/10)
= Aiya, idiot also know result in fail.

All too simple...

2005-08-17T21:33:00.000-07:00

Life.

Get on with it, or bump somebody else off.

Deathlist

2005-08-16T17:40:00.000-07:00

Ah well...It appears it's time to hang out the dirty laundry.

Because once again, class fund is broke.

It's time to let people know who have yet to pay.

'Gasp'

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Charlene---$17(Really outstanding balance)

Xenia---$10(Quite outstanding balance)

Melissa---$5

Ying Feng---$5

Zhao Ying---$5

Jia Min---$8.60

And me---$5

Me?!

Ah well...The privileges that come with being a treasurer.

(Ticks own name,without paying.)

There are some jobs in life that yield benefits and special rights, but not a treasurer.

Haha. Yeah Right.

The most miserable duration of my life...

2005-08-12T19:45:00.000-07:00

I fear, has yet to commence.

Well, nobody likes a whiner.

Everyone feels like this sometimes, it's just that some experience it longer than others.

Lost...

2005-08-11T19:53:00.000-07:00

There are those times in life when you feel ever so lost.......

Just found myself listening to a song I haven't heard in a couple of months...

It's at times like this that I just feel so empty, so lost, so dead...

Sure, everyone feels like that once in a while, but still...

There isn't really much to say, not at this junction in life...

Have you ever felt like this before?

National Day Parade!~

2005-08-09T21:08:00.000-07:00

I find myself trembling as I begin to type this entry, both in excitement and in suppressed laughter.

Yes! It's Singapore's 40th birthday. Happy Birthday Singapore!

The parade was very well-done, but I would have never had made it past the first hour had it not been for one isolated, sadly isolated incident.

The Prime Minister had just arrived at the Padang stadium, and was in the midst of sitting down when I caught it.

The fleeting image, the succulent sandal, the minister behind the Prime minister picking his nose.

Classic.

The image will be imprinted in my mind, and probably on film too.

The one scene I can relate to, regarding this incident, was in Harry Potter, when they went to catch the Quidditch World Cup,

and Ron said,

"Hey look, I can make that old bloke pick his nose again."

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The Costumes

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Back in 2003 when I performed in the NDP, I had thought that my costume was the limit, with sequins prodding uncomfortably into my flesh as I danced the routine.

But it appears this year's batch would have more to complain about.

Firstly, let's recap on the first act: Choa Chu Kang Secondary and CJC

Trees,

treants,

monkeys,

deers,

mountain goats( what were mountain goats doing in Singapore?),

Tigers(The poor dudes must have been boiling in those suits.)

The trees and treants, were just plain sad. I mean, what could be worse than playing a tree? A rock?

The monkeys looked, erm, sick. The suits were just bad. I wonder how much they paid the students to don them. If they wore the outfits out on the street, odds were that they would land a bruise or a black eye.

Deers, a little better than the monkeys, considering they didn't have those disgusting tails.

Mountain goats and tigers, nothing much to be said, except that they reminded me of OWENS house mascot.

Act 2: People's Association

1 Word: Nachos

For those who have seen the performance, I think you'll agree with me that the costumes looked incredibly like nachos, chili, barbeque, original. You name it, they wore it.

Act 3: Songka Association(Note: This is not the real name, I forgot the real name.)

The performers were draped in glittery outfits that had several layers underneath. The myriad of colours helped achieve the overall 'feel' of the performance, making it very noteworthy, especially as to how they were gonna wash it.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Now after these 3 acts I was positively surging with patriotism, that was until

"Hey look, I can make that old bloke pick his nose again." came to mind, which more or less deflated my invigoration.

Then I remembered the troop parade.

The two soldiers leading the president as he inspected the Red Berets seemed as though they were having cramps; tilting ur feet 45 degrees to the ground can lead to acute cramps.

I observed as one of them started poking his head out at an odd angle as he marched, as though in pain.

The things men do for a few medals...

Let's reach out for the skies!~

Happy Birthday Singapore!

Fever...

2005-08-01T18:58:00.000-07:00

Just woke up from my afternoon nap, feeling slightly better.

Can't believe I contracted throat infection, again.

"You have a fever of 39.4 degrees celsius."

Feeling of deja vu.

Absurdity...

2005-07-29T21:38:00.000-07:00

Firstly, before I initiate today's topic, I would like to point out something.

As seen from Da Sao's Blog:

'Well, if you guys like a little background of that guy, his name is kai lun. I'd rather look to him as a da ge ( big brother) i think it's like my relationship with my gor gor, chris in primary school. it's really just that. '

(Note: The above paragraph is directly quoted and hence is a form of plagarism. It has not been approved by the writer herself and I'm placing myself in grave danger typing this.

But...It's the duty of a paparazzi to uncover scandals.

P.S. Please bring me fruits when you visit me in jail.)

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The paragraph sounded vaguely familiar, like some kind of drama series, as if it has been stereotyped into every single female in the whole bloody world.

And to which a male actor would reply, "I only look upon her as a sister."

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Get this: You're not siblings unless you share blood-ties. Simple as that.

I might actually make a good scandal columnist one day.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

And now, to share to you readers, once again,

'The Short Story Series About Benji.'

I repeatedly stress that Benji is my dog, not some human.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

For the past 2 weeks, I've been neglecting my supposedly daily routine of walking Benji. School work, projects and games inevitably got the better of me and I passed up the chance of walking my dog.

Making infrequent trips did have its advantages though, at least I didn't have to meet those people I see everyday whilst walking my dog.

Everyday, walking past those toddlers of 9-16 years of age, I hear the occasional 'Woof' and the ever-annoying 'Meow'.

Like Seriously, Grow up people! Dogs don't respond to 'woofs' and 'meows' that sound as feeble as the generator of these noises.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Here's a definition of noise: Any unwanted sound that irritates people.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
I received approximately 3 'woofs' and 1 'meow' today.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Which leads me to the following question, "Are humans really the most intelligent beings on the planet?"

I think the fault lies either with the knowledge imparted to us from our ancestors, or the current education system.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Maybe people from long ago were wrong in determining that dogs 'woofed' and cats 'meowed'.

Not likely.

-________________-"

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Which means the problem lies with the current education system.

Since young, we have been droned into thinking that dogs communicated only by 'woof', the 'woof' that humans can mimic, and that cats taunted dogs by impressing upon the dogs the superiority of the cats by a brief 'meow', also conveniently shaped into a 'meow' that humans can copy.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hence human was the meditator (Think United Nations, imposing yet ineffective. As in the Iraq War)between the cats and dogs and they learnt their language of 'meows' and 'woofs' from humans.

So cats technically copied their language from humans, hence arriving at the layman term, 'Copycat'.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------That was supposed to be the idea drilled into us from young by the education system. And that dogs and cats actually understood us.

Gullible young minds we were then. Some of us have been enlightened, whilst some still wallow in their naivety.

Thus it is utterly absurd that human would be able to talk to any animals in their own native tongue, with the mere exception of 'cock'.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

But of course, there are people other than the people I've highlighted in this entry that are guilty of these futile communication attempts. I've seen quite a few, but the people I've highlighted still retain the 'most numbers of communication attempts' record.

Just when you thought a fire was the limit...

2005-07-25T20:34:00.000-07:00

The school introduces yet new ways to do me in.

It was supposed to be the first life-science session, 4 in total, today.

It was supposed to enlighten me on the art of DNA.

It was supposed to bring a pleasant end to the tiring school day.

Somehow, it managed to exceed the criteria.

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7pm: The end of the life-science lesson. All was well, spirits were high, and was looking forward to dinner. Well, that all vanished when we exited the Biology lab. The blasted shutter was closed.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7.05pm: Hovering around the corridors of the 2nd storey, trying to find a way out. There were students studying around the corridor where the JC1 chemistry board was located. We screamed, we shouted, and though we were only a shutter away, they didn't respond. Nobody rushed to the General Office, nobody told us what to do, they just stared.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7.10pm: Third floor. Biology lab was on 1st floor. You would think the cleaners would have checked if all the classrooms of a particular school block were unoccupied before they sealed it off. We were like streetkids then, trapped in a departmental store after hours, with nobody to friggin help us. The teachers didn't say anything, at all.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7.12pm: Finally, someone. A group of students had climbed up to the roof via a fire escape ladder. Judging from their actions, we deduced that they hinted that the roof path was safe and that we had clearance to advance. Why else would they climb onto the roof?

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7.14pm: Sprinted across the roof to where the group of students were. We had made it. The only thought that crossed our minds. We were free, to go home.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

7.25pm: Some guy finally went and got the cleaners to open the shutters.

And when we were finally free. And then, unexpectedly, the teacher came and inquired, "Who asked you people to cross?"

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Like Sheesh!

She sounded as if she was concerned that the roof wasn't sturdy enough!

She would have done a much better job asking us not to cross in the first place.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------Anyways, we were deceived by the disillusions presented to us, but we were purely trying to get home.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It's not as if the roof was crumbling or anything. If the teachers/principal/staff agrued that it was unsafe and how would they be able to answer to our parents if anything happened, they were over-concerned.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If they said the roof might have crumbled, it just goes to show how unsafe the school really is. That being said, they might have to close down due to safety issues. Even so, if they had wanted to prevent such 'stupid' behaviour from happening, why didn't they just lock the ladders leading to the roof, like put a barricade or something to deny access to the roof. Why had they left it open? Obviously for situations like this.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If they said we might have slipped from the ladder, they were denouncing the PC teachers, clearly showing no confidence in our physical capabilties and that the PC teachers hadn't trained us well enough to grab to the rungs firmly.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

There was always the issue of accidents, they argue. Simply put, there was always quite a number of people ensuring the person climbing the ladder was safe, ready to support/grab the person should he/she fall from the ladder, a height of around 2 metres.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Having read all this, would you, the reader, agree that our attempt, although impulsive, had incurred no casualities and was relatively safe, by any standards?

Totally Unbelievable!

2005-07-24T00:52:00.000-07:00

As of now, 12.00 am, July 24th, JJC is free from the perils of fire.

But at around 10.10pm, it was a totally different story.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Alumni Night

-was the first event the JC1 ACC members were organising.

-was supposed to help raise funds for the school.

-asked an unknown singer to perform to help attract crowds.

(Weird Logic. Unknown Singer = more people?)

-was so demanding that Lee ling didn't change her attire from Friday.

(An Owens T-shirt. She admitted it.)(Probably didn't bathe either.)

-was virtually killing most of the ACC Ex-Co.

(Not my problem though.)

-Ended with a blast.

Alumni Night Events Catalogue

Downstairs:

18.30-1930: Ticketing.

19.30-20.30: Slack around Tea-Break.

20.30-21.30: Go to hall and attempt Mass Dance.

Hall:

18.30-19.30: Finishing touches on the decor / A few performances.

19.30-20.30: Buffet commences, guests mingle.

20.30-21.30: Mass dance followed by singing of 'JJ Spirit' by ACC members and Council members, led by 'JJ Spirit' song writer.

After 21.30: Guests go home, ACC members clear up.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

What Really Happened.

18.30-19.30: Guests arrive, some with authentic tickets, some slipped in.

Violin performace by an ACC member, who is in the National Youth Symphony. (Sry. No 'Romance'.)

Followed by a dance featuring a male and some females.

Followed by a 'short' speech by an Alumni.

19.30-19.50: Audience dying from hunger, due to lengthened performace by the unknown singer. Unknown singer sets up a booth in the hall and 'graciously' says, " I'll donate 10% of the proceeds from the sale of my items to the school building fund. "

!9.50 -21.00: Audience are ravenous, gobbling down the bee hoon like there's no tomorrow. Constant resupplying of fruit punch from Tea-Break. Year books are placed on display for the Alumni to ogle at. For some reason, JC1/2 volleyball girls were at the event.

21.00-21.30: Blank, in my record. It was Mass Dance. 5 colours in her hair, around the clock, Superstar and that J-Lo song were played. I was hiding out in the toilet then. I am not a dancer.

21.30-21.40: 'JJ Spirit' was sung, according to plan.

After 21.40: Guests left. Operation: OMG! So much F**king rubbish commences.

Apparently someone got fed-up and decided to incite an exothermic reaction to incinerate all the junk.

For some reason, Lee ling was the one who reported the fire.

I was downstairs, heading up to the hall when I heard screams.

Power failure in hall.

Continued walking into hall, reading, "You then go stuff your head in the toilet bowl lah!" message from Jiamin.

I got pushed and was spun around, to face the exit from the hall.

"Fire! Get out lah Ch** By*!" I was told.

People in hall were evacuted to the Con-Course, as vailant warriors tried to fight off the fire in the VIP toilet in the hall with fire extinguishers as old as their own age. 16-20 years old.

And people in the Con-Course were evacuted to the Parade Square.

Fire-Trucks arrived. Fought fire bravely. And obviously, they won.

Along the length of this period, I was frantically smsing people about the incident, until I realised my smses would eventually result in phone bills as red as my 'F' maths test. And that was when I decided I would call it a joke, and stop further transmissions. Afterwhich I called my dad to inform him of the fire.

"Dad, I'll be home later."

"What time? Almost 11pm already leh!"

"Aiya, my school on fire."

And obviously he didn't catch it properly, since his next reply was,

"Chi bao le mah?"

Fast foward to 11.00pm.

Paramedics arrive in a civil defence ambulance. In 05S05, Lee ling and You guan were both exposed to sulphur dioxide and had to undergo a check-up.

I'm a slacker, so naturally, I would never get into any life threatening situations.

And after the check-up, it turns out everyone who inhaled sulphur dioxide was fine.

And then we went home, happily ever after.

And calculating the sales of the unknown singer's items,$0 X 10% = $0

So much for relying on her.

-_____________________-"

The End.

Steps to a spelling game...

2005-07-23T00:59:00.000-07:00

Step 1: Find a new handphone, by any means necessary.

Step 2: Use the 'Smart' word forming feature.

Step 3: Try to spell Eunice.

Step 4: Try it on my phone.

Step 5: You will be amazed at what word presents itself.

Step 6: Laugh your head off.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Alumni Night:

-is approximately 17 hours away.

-is one time, in my life, that I may not be able to slack.

-is gonna absorb the precious weekend.

-is, in a nutshell, gonna ruin my weekend.

Thx alot ACC.

But, "it's your duty", you argue.

And Pigs Fly.

Listening Comprehension

2005-07-20T22:50:00.000-07:00

Was a bore, as usual.

A bore, not boar.

Obviously that was a pitiful attempt, but still, it's rare that I attempt lame jokes.

Exams.

The first A'O' level examinations subject.

The subject we all love so dearly, the subject that binds China and Singapore, the subject we call Chinese.

Lol. My screen is currently bordering on a mask of green with an underlying coat of red, inducing a blur interpretation of whatever I type.

To me at least.

Just saw Chinese as 'Clunise'.

Not Eunice.

She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named.

Okie, back to the topic at hand.

Listening Comprehension was a funny piece of sh*t.

Tuning in to 92.4fm, a broadcasting station with English as its primary language of choice, was a totally apt choice.

The music pieces that were the foreplay to the listening comprehension were like a sleep-inducing deodourants.

5 minutes into the songs, I began to notice light snoring puntuating each verse.

Insomniacs pay heed.

The fact that people were sleeping was a joke upon itself.

Listening Comprehension was supposed to be a test of observation skills and the viligance of the candidates.

And yet, here was the bold evidence presentation of the Art Of Sleeping.

Anyways, it seems everyone commented how easy the test was, everyone except me.

Purely because no one wants to hear me brag.

I wouldn't either.

Selling my blog!

2005-07-15T21:18:00.000-07:00

What you have just witnessed, my dear readers, was an ineffective way of promoting a product.

But at this point, I can't exactly manipulate more resources to materialise my ideal selling gimmick.

Reason 1- My monitor is red. Again. I complain again. Because when people complain, they are absolved from needing to help others.

No link there, just regurgitating my GP burden.

Reason 2- My explorer is dead. For some weird reason, which escapes the scope of my logic, my computer cannot handle Msn Messenger, RealPlayer, and a solitary internet explorer window simultaneously.(Check my spelling!) My Windows Explorer was declared dead as of 9.10pm, 15 July.

Maybe its due to my 56mb RAM. Yes. There are still antiques like that on the market.

Speaking of which, may I interest you in an authentic Pentium 2 computer?

Reason 3 - ACC told me to buck up or risk getting kicked out. Such demoralising news, especially when I've yet to introduce ACC(2), is extremely worrying.

Reason 4 - Progress report. Sucked. Period.

Although it wasn't exactly unexpected.

And now.....(Drum-roll)

It's time to beg for pity!

I urge all of you to donate at least $1 to me, or risk having to pay $5 every SINGLE week to class fund.

And with the controversial case with regards to the NKF, I doubt the midi would work half as well as before.

So there's no longer any need to help me find the midi.

Though I seriously doubt any of you invested any time to help me find the midi.

And you call yourselves friends.

=D

Commitments!

2005-07-13T20:37:00.000-07:00

First of all, I can't believe I was doubtful about my spelling ability, till the extent that i scoured the dictionary to verify if I had spelt my title correctly.

Verify. The word that I've probably seen more times than any other word beginning with the letter 'V'.

I see it twice every fortnight.

'Dear user: Your email verification has expired. Plz Verify.'

Talk about commitments.

Online games are such a bother. Especially when you have a limited range since you computer is not competent enough to engage other game programs.

I'm proud to say I'm the one in my current class with the least commitments!

With regards to school.

ACC( Alumni Connection Club) no longer requires my services.

It's high time I retired.

After 7 meetings? I forget.

I look forward to establishing ACC(2). Even though the principal has implied that he'll sue me should I commence my project.

Acc(2) has several relavant points and desirable points that garners my support.

Back to the topic of commitments.

I'm almost always the earliest to go/reach home in my class.

But, with reference to my previous entry, I agree to a large extent I have an overbearing commitment that no one else in my class has.

Sentence structure : Courtesy of Combined Humanities.
Writer's clothes : Giordano
Writer's shoes : Nike. Big Air.
Writer's hair : Ahmad's salon. Jurong West Avenue 1. Same place where Kailiang got his beehive.

My Dog (2)

2005-07-08T20:48:00.000-07:00

Once again, I find that the time is ripe to blog.

About my dog.

And it's inconsiderate nature.

My dog, as some readers might remember, has the habit of depositing brown molten material in my room.

To curb that, I have taken on the mission of walking him everyday.

An inclusion into my daily timetable that has violently disrupted it.

--------Monday Tuesday Wednesday Thursday Friday

3pm-
5pm Games Games Games Games Games

5pm -------------WALK DOG---------------

6pm- Games Games Games Games Games
sleep

Utterly annoying.

Walking my dog ain't exactly a walk in the park.

My Dog has the habit of trying to attract attention, by all means necessary.

And I do mean BY ALL MEANS NECESSARY.

My dog has:

- deposited shit onto the ground in front of a group of malays.

- deposited shit onto the ground in front of a group of indians.

- cleared his anus in front of a playground with kids screaming/exclaiming,
"Ahhh! Da bian!"

- cleared his anus on the grass beside Hua Yi Secondary with teenagers playing basketball/volleyball, screaming/exclaiming, "Ahhh! Da bian!"

Obviously, though these acts were attention grabbing enough, it didn't fulfil his desire.

He had to perform one final act.

The incident happened yesterday, July 7th, 17.23pm.

I was leading my dog towards Hua Yi Secondary school.

Void decks lined the path to Hua Yi Secondary.

One particular void deck was decorated in white.

"Either a funeral wake or a malay traditional wedding." I thought.

Suddenly, My dog tugged at the line.

He was heaving his entire body weight against the line.

Fearing it might break, I followed him.

He ventured closer to the special void deck.

I saw, at this point, that it was a funeral wake.

I was about to pull him away when he started performing the sarced ritual of encircling a strip of fertile soil.

Then it came.

He began to carry out the obscenely disgusting act of egestion.

Right in front of those attending the funeral wake.

All became silent.

Each pair of eyes bore into me, as if I had committed a terrible crime.

And still my dog trotted away indignantly, oblivious to the hatred he had induced, all because he had to do his 'Business'.

Amazing stuff.

2005-07-07T15:06:00.000-07:00

- London won the Olympics 2012 bid. For once my prophecy didn't hold true.

- Mr H***y Heng managed to complete typing 2404 words in a blog entry. He can go compete with Xiaxue. She claims she has the longest blog entry in the world.

- I managed to finish reading both blog entries without dying from over-indulgence in red-monitor-experiencing-phase-shift-from red-to-green-syndrome.

- I haven't read a book in like a year.

- 6 days since I lasted blogged.

- $26.70 magically disappeared from the class trust fund.

- Mathematics teacher changed.

- I changed blog song.

- I doubt you can hear it.

When everything just seems to run dry...

2005-07-01T19:27:00.000-07:00

Of course homework is not inclusive in 'everything'.

Well not in my case at least.

My monitor is running out of green pigments.

My computer is running out of steam.

I'm running out of excuses for late homework submission.

Da li is err...running out of running.

Yoyo is running out of beehives.

Toto is running out of homework.

Horny H**g is running out of chemistry homework to do.

Small is running out of patience with me.

Eng cai is running out of bandwidth.

Abalone, as usual, is running out of timetables.

Poor guy.

Tsk Tsk.

Juist found a new song I got off the Shaman King ending.

It's :

"Omokage" by Megumi Hayashibara

Sounds kinda powderful.

Yesh. Powderful.

Can't believe my Gp tutor said 'Powderful'.

Well 3 days of holidays ahead!

Today = The beginning of the end.

2005-06-29T20:10:00.000-07:00

Every wednesday to me, is the beginning of the end.

The beginning of the end of the week.

That is erm, a form of figurative speech. Not Irony though.

Don't bother to try and correct me and tell me what type of GP shit it is.

I don't give a shit.

Well, Yun jie's blog has 'Incomplete', someone give me advice on how to add songs to my blog, YJ style.

I don't want radioblog.

I want a song called Midnight illusion. =D

From Ateleir Iris: Eternal Mana.

Well I just added ' To Zanarkand' midi.

I'm working on the wishlist.

And... Class fund owes me money!

This poor treasurer has to dig into his $50 per annum pocket money, and slurge on useless GP notes worth a Friggin $72.60!

Well, Chemistry SPA tomorrow.

For those oblivious to that, I charge $2 for every piece of information.

Someone get me that NKF midi.

School Re-Opens!!~

2005-06-27T21:32:00.000-07:00

Not that it's something to celebrate about.

Firstly the good news.

My monitor is normal again! Once in a blue moon.

Bad news.

Biology test tomorrow.

Obviously people who read my blog are/were biology students, hence I shall not inject anymore hazardous biology terms into your minds.

PC lesson tomorrow.
Right before biology test.
I'm dead.
If they take height and weight again, (Shudders).
Not that doing vigorous exercise is another favourable alternative.

I have shed my iron bowl helmet and adopted a shorter, less effective defense.
Not that that's an entirely bad thing.

Just heard from a friend that Pc lesson tml will be 'Xiong'.

I can't wait till tml comes.

Can you sense the sarcasm?

Unlucky dayz

2005-06-24T01:14:00.000-07:00

It's weird, here I'm, once again, at 1am, blogging my ass off.

And it's a lovely friday morning!

Not considering the fact that I have 5 hours of sleep which will most probably be decreased to 4 due to the biology homework.

It's like I've this irresistable urge to blog whenever my monitor turns red, which is everytime I switch on the computer.

-_______________-"

Probably because the page doesn't include graphics which prioritise green colour.

But I digress.

Today I shall complain, complain and complain.

All about yesterday, afterall it's past midnight.

Woke up this morning at 6am.+, fumbled with the alarm and fell asleep.

Woke up at 7.18am. Wrecked the alarm clock and fell asleep.

Woke up at 7.57am. Class starts at 8am.

Out of house by 8.04am.

Runs to bus stop.

Reaches school somewhere between late and very late.

After lesson, enjoy pentium 4 privileges for a mere 2 hours.

Rushes back to school.

Gets seated and prepares for test, only to discover my sole writing pen = friend's house.

Luckily Kai liang had an arsenal of pens.

Gp test. Crappy question suggests, 'Why do they sponsor choirs?'

People actually sponsor choirs?!

Reaches home, walks dog.

Notices indian man spying on me.

Reaches to pull down blinds to obscure his vision.

Pulls down blind. Absent-mindedly moves backwards. Back comes in contact with sharp corner of cupboard. Pain drives further stupid reflexes. Sharp corner drags along my back like 'connect the dots'.

Result = 8cm scar.

And I haven't cut my hair! I'll scare kiddies later today.

Re: Ghosts

2005-06-21T19:01:00.000-07:00

And I'm back! By popular demand!

How I wish I really could say that.

=(

Anyways, I have decided that today is an auspicious day to talk about ghosts.

Yesh. I've already consulted my almanac. =D

That and the fact that the Sun hasn't set yet.

Anyways now to the topic at hand:

Ghosts

Are you shivering in your pants yet?

I know I'm.

Air-con is at 16 degrees.

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Today is not a definition lesson.

Nooooo. That's for your friendly neighbourhood www.dictionary.com.

Today is about my/other-not-so-important-people experiences.

I never encountered ghosts before and hope I don't meet any soon.

Do you realise it's like every school in singapore is haunted?

Every school has a story of it's own.

I spent the first year of primary school believing a female teacher died in the girl's toilet.

Scared me silly it did.

I find it funny now that I wasn't half as scared when my partner threatened to thrust a penknife into me, in the same year too.

Of course maybe it was because of the fact that the penknife bended whenever it came in contact with anything harder than air.

Then on to campsites.

People always complain hearing 'weird noises' at night whenever I go to a camp.

Maybe it was something sinister, or maybe it was just my snoring.

And on to army camps.

If you watched the series, err, I forgot the show name.

-_________________________________-"

Nvm. It was on channel five and featured scary ghost stories.

There was one on the army camp.

And now to relate a true file!

My sister's Bf was on night patrol in an army camp.

Somehow he didn't realise an old woman holding hands with a small boy at 2 in the morning in an army camp signalled something amiss.

He chatted with the old woman. 'Gasp!'

Directed her to the nearest toilet.

Turned around and she was gone.

Maybe she vanished. Or maybe she sprinted to the toilet.

One of life's greatest mysteries.

I never seen ghost when I was awake.

I dreamt of ghosts though.

And on those nights, my sister, who was working on her university exams at the time, heard weird noises coming from outside her room, where i slept.

She opened her door to see nothing was amiss.

Anyways, on to my dreams.

Must have been like 2 years ago.

I dreamt of ghosts twice.

And weird thing is, both times, the ghosts were in my home's bathrooms.

Two separate bathrooms.

One was like green, and crouching below the shower.

Another, was invisible initially.

I was dreaming, and that I just turned away from the toilet bowl, to come face to face with a zombie.

Those cheena zombie, you'know.

Scary. Brrr. Oh noooo. Sun setting.

Wasting away...

2005-06-18T20:07:00.000-07:00

Sigh... The holidays are almost over.

One week...or rather half a week left...considering the punctures in the holidays the teachers made with their lessons.

-_________-"

Just finished my first piece of homework.

Still got tonnes left.

I'm not gonna make the deadline.

And I've got a red monitor every other day.

I spend one day hitting the monitor till it turns to normal, and spend another day recovering from the battering my hand received via Newton's third law.

Physics...Who needs them.

At this rate, my eyes will turn selectively colour-blind.

Can't even watch Gundam Seed Destiny.

234. Nope. That aint the size of a gundam seed video.

Thats the average number of times I click the 'drag timeframe' bar to make the video advance.

Sighz. I think I'm growing fatter. Napfa is looming nearer, like doom.

Retest is gonna be a disastor.

I think the only thing keeping those calories in check is walking my dog.

-____________-"

Ghosts

2005-06-16T01:13:00.000-07:00

I'm gonna speak on that topic another day, considering it's 1am. and all.

Hehz, life is so boring without pentium 4, and having to wake up each morning to find a deposit of stool in the kitchen, courtesy of my dog doesn't exactly soothe the pain.

I'm donning a new shirt today, find that I kinda look like a gangster in it.

It ain't all that difficult to imagine.

Anyways, I got dragged into playing little fighter 2 today.

One word: Hellish.

I got trashed so bad, I lost my appetite.

Sigh, I haven't started on my homework. I sense impending doom. And there's an ACC meeting at 10.30am today.

Sheesh. I can't find time to do homework. And yet I can find time to work on my games. Pentium 2 can still help hone your solitare skills.

!!!

It's so late! (8½ hours of sleep remain.)

Heh. Holidays.

Who couldn't do without them?

Certainly not me.

Weird things

2005-06-12T21:54:00.000-07:00

Okie...Family function is over.

Like finally.

I was gonna write about something else today, but I just heard something from outside, as though it was beckoning me...

Using a loudspeaker.

Yesh. It's almost that time of year again.

The 'auction period'.

Where people scream out prices like there's no tomorrow.

Nope I ain't talking about Sotheby's .

The auctions I'm talking about aren't that high tech, as in using signs to signify a bid.

Yes. Now you know. It's those chinese auctions.

Where people scream in dialect and boast about their bids, and later realise that they didn't bring the $9k they promised the organiser.

I was eating fried chicken...(Mmm..) when I heard the speakers blar,

The segment below will be in semi chinese and dialect/hokkien.

" Gor cheng!"
" Wu qian ba shi ba!"
" Luck cheng gor bei puai zep puai!"
" Liu qian wu bai ba shi ba!"

And inevitably, people get confused.

" Liu qian puai bai puai zap ba kuai qian!"

Like sheesh...No skills = don't attempt multi-linguallism.

(Hint: I doubt there's such a word.)

Up till now that guy is still screaming his throat sore, and again...I hear,

" San qian gor ba shi(1) shi(2) kuai."

Like seriously...

Can't be bothered.

-_________-"

o.0

2005-06-11T23:10:00.000-07:00

I know. I know.

This is a weird time to be blogging, seeing how I'm at a family function and all.

But family functions aren't concentration camps, there are breaks, or rather, there's no workload.

Besides, It's so late, and bedtime is almost here.

Nothing is more demanding than sleep.

Haven't really got much to say, so hence I apologise for wasting a whole 30 seconds of your precious life.

Now, go on with your life.

Might/Will/May update tommorrow.

Stay tuned.

Away from keyboard...for 3 days...

2005-06-09T19:00:00.000-07:00

-User will be away for 3 days on a family function.

-Yes. It's true.

-Like why would I lie?

-Handphones/Internet connection/(any form of communication) will be rendered invalid.

-In a nutshell, don't harrass me.

Okie...now to today's topic.

Pests.

You know, those creatures smaller than dogs.

Lizards, cockroaches, ants, spiders, and that distant bald baby cousin.

*-* My house = house of death *-*

Ants: killed by me when I was a kid.

Execution methods: Sticking tape across their ant holes. When that didn't work, I found another use for medicated oil.

Spiders: Again killed by me when I was a kid.

Execution methods: Trapped in those $0.50 sour plum containers, they squirm as i force a piece of tissue down, squishing them.

(P.S: I'm not that sadistic now. I'm worse. J.K. =P)

Cockroaches: killed by parents when I was a kid. (The cockroaches,not me.)

Execution methods: When the rag-&-bone man refused to pay the exorbitant price of $0.20 for 5 kilograms of newpaper, the paper became recycled in another manner. You should have seen the flying cockroach that earned my dad his first home run.

Lizards: I know, lizards are good, they eat mosquitos. But, killed by parents when I was a kid. (Need I stress it's not me?)

Execution methods: Only one instance. It's not everyday that a lizard lands in your cup. It was 5.am. My dad wanted coffee. The lizard was in his cup. He didn't switch on the light. He didn't know. In case you're assuming he drank it,(Ugh! Sick!) that didn't happen.

(Hears 'Aww!' in the background.)

Even at 5.am, in semi-darkness, you would notice that after adding boiling hot water, 3-in-1 coffee powder does not coagulate to form a 'presence' with a tail that floats on water.

Distant cousin: You may have killed yours but I certainly didn't kill mine.

I ain't That psycho.

Black trees

2005-06-06T23:15:00.000-07:00

No this post is not about forest fires, racism and discrimination.

Obviously I'm NOT that noble.

Staring out of my window at the moment.

You don't exactly see rainbows at 11.15pm.

Yes. I like darkness.

Don't ask me why.

I was born like this.

I like money too. So send me a check sometime.

And no, I don't accept checks that bounce, since none of the banks do.

Okie back to darkness.

Notice this blogskin is primarily black.

But I don't see it as black.

Cause my monitor is red.

Have a heart, donate please.

I'm thinking that adding the NKF midi will help serve my cause. =D

Someone send me that.

Yes. Singapore kids are spoilt. So sue me.

2005-06-04T16:34:00.000-07:00

I think I'm getting on everyone's nerves.

Irony.

2005-06-02T17:46:00.000-07:00

When you're a kid, you just wanna grow up real quick and make like a gazillion dollars, buy some expensive crap and flaunt it to your friends.

When you're an adult, you just wanna go back to being a kid and save those teeth you had.

Keyboard Malfunction

2005-06-01T20:38:00.000-07:00

Typing that title alone took a good ½ hour.

Curse you you fricking keyboard.

On the brink of death...

2005-05-28T15:24:00.000-07:00

Went home on Friday at 2pm, skipped my Co-curriculum activity.

I kinda started having a flu that morning,
went around borrowing tissue paper to clog my nose.
Didn't even think of it as anything serious,
I just wanted to get home.

Decided to use it as an excuse to skip ACC.

Bad things happen.

Went home, took a nap,
woke up with temperature soaring.
Ate some panadol.
Took a sip of dinner.
Chatted.
Went to sleep at 12am.
Failed.
Tossed and turned in bed till 2am.
Awoke at 7am.
Felt horrible.

Caught a couple of shows.
Felt myself burning up, again.
Switched on air-con.
Slept for an hour.
Watched some more T.V.
Killer cousins came.
5 bawling, brawling, bony babies.
All came to my room and started screaming baby expletives at one another.
To top it off, my dog started barking.
Argh.
I told their moms I had a fever,
And boy! should you have seen their faces!
One registered surprise and the other horror.
'Oh God! Help me!' I swear I heard her mutter.

Pushing and tugging, the mothers forced the babies out.

Went to the doctor at 6.30pm.
He said, 'You have a throat infection, your fever is at 39.6*.'
I was gonna die, I just knew it.
'Take your anti-biotics and you'll be fine.'

Took my dinner, devoured my medicine.
Drowsiness set in and I fell asleep, with my msn messenger still online.
It was like 7.45pm, I think.
Almost 20 hours later, I'm here blogging, feeling much better.

10 Things not to say to your Treasurer.

2005-05-25T20:54:00.000-07:00

-What? You failed your maths?

-Is that a pentium 2 you're using?

-You're FAT.

-I got tonnes of money.

-I want a 10% cut of whatever you are getting.

-Dude! My grandma has a better handphone than you!

-No. Buy your own donut.

-I hear there's a new game shop in town, buy in bulk and you get a discount.

-I got a priceless Gransazers collection at home.

-You know what a cat did? It turned. (Mountain, geddit?)

If you can read this, your monitor is still functional.

2005-05-20T22:40:00.000-07:00

Updating almost everyday, don't think people are reading though.

But nonetheless, I shall blog.

JJC seems to be getting better.

Sports are advancing further.

Volleyball girls clinched the National Champion title, Rugby should do well, as usual, and softball beat NJC!

Also, let's not forget about Indian Dance! Gold with Honours in SYF!

Malay Dance got Gold too. (or was it Gold-with-Honours?)

Speaking of the Indian Dance, I'm reminded of an incident in my primary school.

Honourary Guest Indian Dancer Incident.

Was primary 2 then.

Indian dancer is invited to school to display her arts.

Primary 2 = Seated on the ground right in front of stage(front row seats).

Indian melody resounds in hall.

She starts dancing.

Primary 2 isn't exactly the age when you are interested in Indian Dance.

Scans the stage and sees a cockroach!

Tells friend.

Cockroach crawls dangerously close to the dancer.

Dancer is stomping on the stage without seeing the cockroach.

(Suspects she's making eye contact with principal, Mr Pop-eye Scruton.)

Next moment...

'Squish'

Dancer stops.

Dancer gives a totally priceless 'eww!' expression.

Hall is silent.

What an awkward scene.

~End~

We will strive to build up a better college, and sell our smooth water!

(Or so the principal says.)

Hope softball wins.

Lost & Found

2005-05-16T20:03:00.000-07:00

Just counted class fund after goodness knows how long.

Found, to my horror, that $4 was missing.

I swear I only embezzled $2, at most.

Wonder where the rest of it went.

I wonder who took it?

Maybe I'll tell the teacher my dog ate it.

Maybe I'll say I accidentally burned the money.

Or maybe I'll just tell the truth and say it's gone, forever, and that I won't
reimburse my class.

Nah.

Anyways...Who is pizza. Identify yourself.

Mathematics suck.

Lao gui bu.

(/kick Lao gui bu)

DaRkNeSs BeCkOnS

2005-05-15T21:56:00.000-07:00

Yay!

Finally changed my blogskin, don't think there will be anymore complaints now.

Was getting sick of Yuna anyways.

And now, no more small wordings!

One-liners rule.

Okie, I need a way to add songs to my blog, open to suggestions.

You guys could just paste the format for jukebox/media player in my taggy.

Thx. =D

Hate life, love money, hate my comp, love my dog, sick of dumplings, can't get enough of shaman king.

My wishlist should be up soon. You guys know what that means.

In case you need to know when to give gifts to me, my B'dae is to the right.

=D

For those in my current class: Don't buy for me = I'll dock from class fund.

Don't I just annoy you?

Hope I get to be ACC treasurer, can embezzle more!

$_$

And if I get rejected, which I'll probably experience...

(>.<")

I'll just collect more $$$ from class fund.

=D

F-I-R-S-T = Me!

2005-05-12T19:18:00.000-07:00

Obviously it didn't last very long.

But I was first for 10-15 seconds!

How it happened:

-400 metres sprint.

-Everyone gets in position.

-"For ACC!" ( Alumni Connection Club) I scream.

-Starts race.

-Zoooooom.

-Takes everyone by surprise by dashing.

-Thoughts in their mind: [What's that idiotic Rono think he's doing?]

-Runs 200 metres, then butt muscles go numb.

-Oh Shit! (This is not intended as a lame joke, butt and shit.)

-Second guy overtakes me.

-More follow.

-Class boys overtake me.

-Thoughts in their minds: [Haha..run so fast then no stamina to carry on.]

-Struggles to complete 400 metres.

Upon finishing, grabs bag and staggers to canteen. Butt muscles refuse to acknowledge the

impulses sent from brain to make them move.

Rested for a while and went home.

Saw 'Beckham' going in direction of the building opposite of the petrol kiosk.

( Maybe she resides there?)

Above info is provided for Mr Acknowledgemement.

Small little horny heng played with his yo-yo whilst buying Toto,

afterwhich he bought yi dali guo tie filled with abalone and eng cai.

And please, no more cash-shinoos anymore.

To Zanarkand...

2005-04-29T22:12:00.000-07:00

Fantasies, images that we make up, dreams that can never be fulfilled.

Life is like a dream, and it became a nightmare for me early this morning.

Woke up this morning at 6am. I know, I know, You guys probably woke up much earlier...

But...I was supposed to lie in for a lil bit till 6.30am.

Every morning, my alarm clock would jolt me awake, leaving me cursing and swearing.

However, this morning, I awoke by...erm...a less conventional method.

The morning air was wafting into my room, the fresh air that was supposed to bring

oxygen, grant life, almost ended up asphyxiating me.

A dense, pungent Presence saturated the air in my room, assaulting my olfactory senses

until I was pleasantly awoken. (Gp tutor: Identify the tone the author is using in this part.)

In semi-darkness, I could make out my dog's silhouette sitting on the floor beside my bed.

Obviously no mammal with a clear conscience would sit by someone's bed before dawn

with ears drawn down and stare at that someone with huge, innocent eyes once he awoke.

Switching on the lights, I did a brief assessment of my room.

Target spotted.

At a dark corner in my room, lay some UFOs (Uniquely-Fatal-to-olfactory-sense).

Tainted brown by nature, these chemical agents betray an annoying smell.

Hence it can be used as riot-control agents.

Argh...Too much project work...going crazy...

I promptly cleared the 'items' and...that was when I realised the 'items' had left a part of

them on my telephone line that is linked to the modem, as a memento.

Talk about Good Luck.

The thirteen of May falls on a Friday this year! Brace yourselves all.

New template, new song, and new problems...

2005-04-28T21:42:00.000-07:00

Wahahaha...I changed the blog template and the blog midi today,

as you can clearly see.

But let me apologise...I have yet to find a suitable colour for the colour of the font.

So please bear with the colour for a while.

Just realised that I haven't got anything to type today, except that I didn't get called the

Weakest Link in physical conditioning class (PCC) today.

But that was just because the PCC teacher didn't come,

maybe he was having another PCC?

PCC...=D

After Physical Conditioning Class, rain began to fall...

I love rain.

Hope it rains more often...the weather is soo stifling nowadays.

GO JEGA YOGA!

The highlight of today is...

2005-04-27T20:55:00.000-07:00

Yoga!

But before that...let's rewind to approximately 3pm this afternoon.

Me, Derek, Yun jie were at the grandstand watching the softball match.

JJ was getting trashed...so we decided to switch our focus to more 'entertaining' things.

To the left: A shoeless guy was using his bag as a pillow while he slept.

To the front: Grass, grass and more grass.

To the right: Yu Su and Lee Ling were cheering on the softball team.

Went to yoga today at 4pm, learnt to breathe, did some propagand-ish moves,

kowtowed to the teacher dozens of times. (He insists doing those moves benefit us)

After learning to breathe...did a shoulder stand!

Boy was it cool!

Then the teacher started having a fit, and began to hyperventilate.

He was sniffing in and forcing air out rigorously, then he told us it was a method to 'cure' cramps.

Talk about using poison to fight poison. (Direct translation from chinese saying)

Proceed on to other positions that the teacher said would help us prevent spine injury and slipped

discs.

Bullshit.

Judging from the response elicited from the students after doing the positions, I gather about half of

them are gonna need wheelchairs even earlier in their lives.

One girl even had to hyperventilate to cure her back cramp.

~Lesson ends~

On way out of school compound, chatted with a friend.

Me: What preliminary idea did you think up for your project work?

Him: I'm gonna use squid.

Me:(mock horror) You're using squid?

Him: Ya.

Me: What part?

Him: I'm thinking of using the ink.

Me:(Horrified) You're using squid ink too?

Him: Don't tell me...

Me:(nods resignedly) I'm using squid ink too.

Him:(His turn to be horrified) As what?

Me:(grins stupidly...) Shoot baddies lor.

Him: Heng! I'm using it as a lightsource, with the luminous bacteria.

Him+Me:(Sigh of relief)

Went out of school, and took out my wallet, checked for ez-link card.

Okie, it's still there. I can take a bus home.

And with that, I proceeded to walk all the way home...

Got someone you hate? If it' me...dun bother.

But in other applicable cases...you can go to http://pabstlovers.org/~jonese/name.php

Oh my...

2005-04-25T22:37:00.000-07:00

Experimented with a new blog template today, which looked fabulous. (Can't say it's fantabulous

cos someone already registered that word as their own.)

However, found that the template had no space for links...so had to let it go..till I master the basics

of template editing. So sticking to current blog format. Dun complain about it, It's MY blog, not

yours.

Went searching for more midis todae, found a totally cool midi! 'Curious play ending 1'

Cheerful, and erm...fun, lively, and erm...and everything I'm not!

I'm currently updating my blog when an unusual request came in.

"What's another word for big-breasted?" (Due to the code of privacy, I shall not reveal his name)

Me: "Huh?"

Him: "Can I use 'bountiful'?"

Me: "Eh...no. I dunno. Give me a few minutes to think it through..."

Several minutes pass.

Me: "Why don't you use...erm...'assets'?"

Him: "Okay, I'll try that out."

A word suddenly flashes into my mind.

Me: "Well-Endowed! That's it!"

Me: =)

Him: (Offline and didn't catch my word.)

Me:@#%#@$

Total waste of time.

Btw...To Student-Counsellor Wannabes in my current class...even if they dun read this...

I think you guys rock!

(Note: This part of the posting has been altered and is not based on a true story,

and is only to boost confidence of the above mentioned. Please do not

take this seriously.)

Ever since I have realised that there isn't a candidate number #46, I have decided to utilise

my votes by voting for you!

Someday the dream will end...

2005-04-24T16:40:00.000-07:00

is the name of the midi you are listening to, but that's besides the point.

Just began to think about my past...my primary school friends, secondary school friends and so on.

Friends who made up the first twelve years of my life have grown distant, moving away, seeking

different futures. I have lost touch with friends I grew up with, friends i played with, friends who

shared my burdens.

Even as new friends are made, I find that I can't commit myself, to grow closer to them, an

inexplicable feeling, I just can't fit in.

But this is going too in depth into my life.

Time to write what I truly came to write today.

A former classmate left for Hongkong last month. Reading his blog, I found that he's pinning

for many of his closest friends that were in Singapore. He wants to return but has to remain in

Hongkong.

Bound to duty, he has to forgo his friends. Sounds dramatic, but that's the way it is.

To those reading: Don't take your friends for granted. One day they will juz leave, maybe

forever. Treasure them well. As you would treasure your family. (I know this sounds

cliched but don't ignore it.)

I'll find a way to solve my problems.

Surprise Surprise!

2005-04-22T20:15:00.000-07:00

Yesh! Got into Alumni Connection Club( ACC )( Plz check for spelling error )

Was kinda expecting a "You are the weakest link" episode again during the ACC orientation

today.

Then it turns out all member applicants were accepted! Or so the current President of the

ACC acknowledges.

"But first you have to fill in this membership form."

-Grabs membership form.

-Reads its contents.

-Sees slots which potential members might want to apply for in 2nd year.

-EYES WIDEN AT 'TREASURER' POST.

And that was about all that happened for ACC meeting,

discounting the water-balloon-captain-ball-style game and the 'Milk game',

as well as the fact that i got drenched from head to toe.

I have my own geocities site at last, can upload midis there! woot!

Okay. It's official. The whole world hates me. Shan't elaborate. Period.

What could be cooler than...

2005-04-21T19:24:00.000-07:00

being being called, "You are the weakest link."

Which was what I was told, by my PC (physical conditioning) teacher.

Went to sleep at 1am this morning thinking, "I'll only rest only for a lil

while, and finish my bio h/w.

Woke up at 6am. this morning.

-________-

Went to school, opened my file, to reveal 3 pages of unfinished bio,

rushed, slogged, and still didn't manage to complete them before my bio

class.

Series of events follows:

-Bio teacher entered class and said, " I gave a shelling (chiding) to my bio

classes yesterday, nearly ended up in hospital due to my bursting veins."

-Bio teacher announces, "To save myself from ending up in hospital, I am not

gonna walk around and see your empty scripts."

-Heaves a sigh of relief.

-Notices bio teacher is acting weird throughout her lesson. (She acts carefree,

surprisingly.) May be due to bursting veins.

Fast forward to PC lesson.

-Runs 800 metres.

-Do warm-up exercise.

-Nightmare begins.

PC teacher says, "Those who failed NAFTA test last year plz follow me."

-Follows PC teacher.

-He points to some other groupies in my 'failed NAFTA test" association. " GO

RUN 3.2km." He barks.

Training regime begins.

-Inclined pull ups [ did 25 =( ]

PC teacher proceeds to yell, "You cha bo isit!", at me when there was a group of

30+ girls around listening in.

-Hop-on-bench-and-jump-down-again. (50 times)

Legs felt like jelly shortly thereafter.

-Horizontal-pull-up-movement (monkey bar style)

PC teacher: "Do five sets! go!"

Me= fall and retry + fall and retry + ...

PC teacher, in exasperation "You are the weakest link, go run 400m X4"

Current status: shacked.

New exercise regime set up.

Hope you enjoyed reading.

My dog...

2005-04-18T19:54:00.000-07:00

Eh...still working on the tagboard...can't figure out what to do...but nvm...

My dog has a rather unique name...Benji.

Sounds human...

Been hearing his name from my friends these few months.

"That Benji...always like to chiong so fast."

(Thinks to self.)'Yeah,he likes to run fast. But how did they know?'

"I hear he's trying out to be an OGL..." [Wasn't my dog after all.-_-"]

My dog is virtually my best friend...no...not because I can't communicate well with other

humans...well actually i can't...but that's beside the point.

But we weren't on such good terms at the beginning.(my dog and me, not me and other humans.)

Below are some of the reasons.

-he likes to mark his territory, which is fine...except that his prime plot is my bed.

-he licks his ass before he greets me.(with licks when i come back)

[kinda speaks for itself doesn't it]

-he's selfish...he grabs the remote control for the television whenever he

can...when his only use for it is a makeshift chewtoy.

-he farts without warning first...(then again...so does 99% of the human

population.) (-____-)

Will continue nx time.

Virgin attempt

2005-04-15T22:25:00.000-07:00

The first posting...hmm...no idea what to write yet, but anywayz...its a start.

Spent the first few hours after dawn sleeping, whlist my frens at school were slogging it out at

school today. =)

Waking up though, stirred another feeling. Irritation. Woke up to my sister screaming,

"Wake up already! We're running late!"

Which led me to rush to get ready to go out.

15 mins after i was ready, her room door was still securely sealed.

"Be out in a minute."

Ten minutes past before she came out, saying, "Do something about you hair." and

handed me a tub of wax.

"It's wax."

Why would she need it?

Images of Marge Simpson came to mind.

And so we left.

Now at this time, my hair is clumped together like a freak of nature, multiple attempts to wash off

the wax have failed, which brings me to my next question, what type of wax did she give me? Might

have to resort to detergent to get it off... -_-" Wish me luck...

Alabaster

Revival.........Nah...Nothing fancy like that.

A Turn

NS Enlistment

The fine line

The eve of the eve of christmas eve

The First Day

Stuck.

A New Chapter

New Post

Questionable Character

Blogging

Total Defence Day

Internet Connection

The longest wait

Birthdays

Chain Mail

I'm back!~ *Temporarily*

I've done it!

The End

And this makes it four!

Updating.....again?!

A Fresh Perspective

Updating.

Myself

Another one of those days...

Anime

9 million bicycles

Melting Snow Flakes...

Just bite me

It's all about 'Face'

It's over.

Weekend

Fun homework

Maelstrom of doom

Hooked

Get free software here!

Apologies...

I can see a flying whale...

How do you feel at this point in time?

I'm an oof.

All too simple...

Deathlist

The most miserable duration of my life...

Lost...

National Day Parade!~

Fever...

Absurdity...

Just when you thought a fire was the limit...

Totally Unbelievable!

Steps to a spelling game...

Listening Comprehension

Selling my blog!

Commitments!

My Dog (2)

Amazing stuff.

When everything just seems to run dry...

Today = The beginning of the end.

School Re-Opens!!~

Unlucky dayz

Re: Ghosts

Wasting away...

Ghosts

Weird things

o.0

Away from keyboard...for 3 days...

Black trees

Irony.

Keyboard Malfunction

On the brink of death...

10 Things not to say to your Treasurer.

If you can read this, your monitor is still functional.

Lost & Found

DaRkNeSs BeCkOnS

F-I-R-S-T = Me!

To Zanarkand...

New template, new song, and new problems...

The highlight of today is...

Oh my...

Someday the dream will end...

I'm back!~ Temporarily